Turns out noticing things is now a revolutionary act. This heavyweight tee pays tribute to the most dangerous weapon you can carry in polite society: your own eyes and a halfway functional brain.

Printed in retro-wave neon for maximum aesthetic disruption, this shirt says exactly what the blue-check crowd is terrified of—without you having to say a word. Thick, structured, and built to outlast the narrative.

• 100% ring-spun cotton
• Fabric weight: 6.1 oz/yd² (206.8 g/m²)
• Garment-dyed
• Relaxed fit
• 7/8″ double-needle topstitched collar
• Twill-taped neck and shoulders for extra durability
• Double-needle armhole, sleeve, and bottom hems

Size guide